When the System Breaks Everything (Including the Good Spaces)

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This week I’m sharing a different type of article. I have less time to write my now habitual article, and I decided to be intentional about it.

This is my personal reflection; a letter to people that feel fed up.

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Jiayue Li

It’s April 4th, 2026. I just finished a 40-minute meditation that my friend Joshua sent me. I felt so much joy and calmness. I was happy that the next topic of my article would be... But a sensation and thought came up to me. That while I’m here feeling grateful and peaceful, not everyone is living the same reality. Not everyone can pay their bills. Not everyone has a roof over their head. Not everyone feels safe…

While I’m feeling joy and thankfulness for this moment I also feel pain because I would rather we all feel like that.

How did we come to that? Why?

Humanity is sick and needs deep healing.

I don’t know who first thought about making money and power the center of everything. But it sucks. Our world is broken. I feel it.

So I try to live one day at a time and be grateful for the present moment. Because sometimes I feel that the sci-fi movies I grew up with are actually happening. And I don’t know what to do.

I’m currently in a situation where I cannot be a fighter in the sense of supporting what I believe in, in the world, in politics, in society, without putting my residency at risk unless I leave and gain my freedom back elsewhere. And to go where?

Some people say ‘you have nothing to worry about’ - and I know they mean because I’m white. Does that make me feel more comfortable? No.
Why should I feel safer than someone with a different color of skin? It’s unfair that this is how the world works. And even with that privilege, I still feel scared. I make myself small, transparent, like a chameleon adapting to survive. I follow every rule. I have a hard time with all of this to be honest.
It feels conflicting, wrong, offensive, raging and so much more that I cannot express out loud or here in this letter with my writing.

It’s heavy. I don’t feel it every day but it’s a weight on my shoulders.

And this sickness - this power and money at the center of everything - it’s everywhere. Even in the spaces we thought were different.

A good example that comes to my mind is Substack. I see that people who have been on it for years feel a frustration. I wasn’t on it back then but I wish I was. Because being in a space where people are just people. A place where we share our humanity without someone telling us we could do differently or “how to”.

I feel there are always some people who come to kill the party. To offer how to party “better”. All those articles on how to have more subscribers, more money, more... Like the one that brings the drug to a party where people were enjoying themselves without it. I’m tired of the FOMO’s dealer.

And I wonder if all those messages are actually creating a problem, pressure, disappointment, and unnecessary comparison.

What I do is slow, intentional, grounded. It might not look attractive to everyone. I only want to be attractive and fulfilling to me.

Give a chance to yourself.

Give a chance to that life.

The universe is waiting for your signal. Your decision with your whole heart in it.

The veil has been lifted. You know the reality. What comes next is up to you.

Do you want to keep playing their game? Or do you want to create something that looks like you?

Whose life is it?

Yours.

With Love,
Nina

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